Wednesday, February 15, 2012

i repeat myself all day long.

i would venture to say that the three most over-used words i say everyday would be,
"listen and obey."
it starts in the morning and doesn't really end until we're wrapping up the evening.
everyday before nap time, we go out back and play for about an hour.
a sample of this common phrase might go something like this:

me: listen and obey, please, miles. stay on the grass and do not run up the hill. you know the rules.
miles: continues up the hill.
me: miles, i said obey. mommy is fat and out of breath from walking to the edge of the patio, so i cannot chase you up the hill right now. please obey. stay on the grass or there will be a consequence.
miles: continues up the hill.
me: MILES. you did not obey. inside we go. 
miles: screaming. flailing arms. full tantrum in force.



and so it goes. 
there are times where he will "listen and obey" right away and i'll be so excited that my hard work is paying off. and then we have the times where it takes major consequences that exhaust me and make me feel like i'm failing at my job as a mother. i feel defeated. i feel confused. and a lot of days, i feel completely lost. i would say that learning how to discipline my child in a consistent way that is honoring to the Lord is probably the hardest thing i've ever done in my entire life.


you know what the crazy part about it is? 
how many times a day does God ask me to listen and obey?
and how many [thousands] of times a day do i just keep walking up the hill pretending that i didn't hear him?
and then...how many times does he say, "look, there will be consequences for your actions...."
and how many times do i still walk up that hill?
and on top of that....how many times do i throw embarrassing adult tantrums because i didn't get my way?
you would think being that i'm almost 31 and about to give birth to my 2nd child, i may act a little more mature than my 20-month-son. but no....in a lot of ways, we are just the same.

i remember a few years back, i was doing a bible study at church about the cost of following Christ.
and one thing i learned right away that God makes no ifs, ands, or buts about it.
when he called his disciples to follow Him, he simply said, "come."
and they went.
they literally left everything to follow Jesus. they left their jobs, they left their wives. they left their kids.
one dude didn't even get to bury his dead dad.
he said, "follow me" and they followed.

you know what i would do if scooter left right now to follow someone like that?
i'd be on the phone in, like, 2.2 secs saying, "boyyyyyyy....you better get your little hiney back here and get your priorities straight. and if you don't come home with a mocha almond milkshake, you can count your dinner good as gone."

but these men....they just did it. they just followed him no matter what the cost. 

they obeyed on the first time around.


i feel like as i learn how to parent more and discipline more, God is gently showing me areas that i need to work on as a child of Him. hard areas that i don't want to pay attention to. but i personally take such delight when miles obeys the first time around. my heart literally bursts with pride. and i know God just wants the same for me. so as i work on being a consistent mother that graciously asks my child to obey all day long, i am praying that i open my eyes more to the ways God longs for me to obey Him.

following Jesus is hard work. 

(also. p.s. i would never talk to my husband like that. but i might withhold dinner if he refuses to bring me a milkshake.)

17 comments:

  1. katy i love this. i had a moment today with livie where she was freaking out about something & i was telling her how silly it was to be so scared- that she didn't need to be so fearful- and last night i had a totally melt down cause i was living in major fear. it was such an ironic moment.

    thanks for the encouragement. love u.

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  2. this is such a timely post!! God has been showing me this about Wilder and the way it coincides with my obeying or not obeying Christ when he commands. both jobs difficult. both jobs doable because we are not in it alone.

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  3. truth right here. on all counts.
    i learn everyday from raising my boys. we are much the same. take heart it'll get better i went from saying listen and obey 7000 times a day to 700 times a day. this has been on my heart lately ~no one ever said it was going to be easy but it's so worth it...on all counts. my boy will be 13 tomorrow and were moving into a whole new world. ahhh! everyday when i drop him off at school i tell him "even though mom can't be with you every second of everyday *tear* God is you need to conduct yourself in a manner that is pleasing to him...Mkay" all the while i'm still learning to conduct myself. aye!
    great post katy.

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  4. love this...sorry but I laughed about you having to chase him and being out of breath...story of my life right now...I beg please just listen and help mommy out, I can't move or chase or bend...lol.


    discipline is rough...but I promise it is the age and if you stick to it, it will pay off : ) My son is 2 and I struggle with this daily, the 5 year easy as pie now but there was a time she wasn't so easy :)

    also so true about this applying to our walk with God!

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  5. i like this :) seriously, every time i leave your blog, i'm so inspired - as a mom, as a wife, and most important, as a sister in Christ.

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  6. aw sweet katy. i know first hand that you are a first rate mama. you are so diligent and loving with Miles. and i love your lil analogy it was so introspective and thoughtful. I so love reading your heart and thoughts. love you!

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  7. praise jesus for you. this is legit.
    praying for endurance as you press on. you're a great mama, girl!
    so encouraged here today. xo

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  8. This is literally exactly my life right now. My son is just a couple months ahead of Miles (I also just had a baby girl, so our family situation is really similar) so we have been going through the same discipline stuff. I totally agreed with you on how difficult consistent God-honoring discipline truly is. I'm encouraged to read this & remember that I'm not alone. Thank you for sharing, be encouraged & pursue Christ today! So thankful that parenting leads us to the feet of Jesus!

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  9. so true. so true. we need tape recorders strapped to us so we can just push a button when we want to repeat something. but you're right. we do the same dumb stuff over and over. you're a wise one, friend :)

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  10. Neat post babe. Love you, Mama

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  11. Miles and Baby girl are two lucky kiddos to have such a wonderful Momma. I love the thoughts you share. It always brings me back to a place I need to be. Thank you.

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  12. yes. such hard work.
    one step in front of the other.
    grace and more grace is the most precious gift.
    (we can do it!) in His strength.
    happy weekend to you, katy
    <3 <3 <3

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  13. What a fantastic post, so inspiring and true!

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  14. Oh how I remember feeling too big to chase my kid around! On the days when I feel no one is listening to me, I think to myself "don't give up, at the end you want to hear well done good & faithful servant." Sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn't so I plop on the couch with my 4th cup of coffee and some cookies. Hang in there friend ;) xoxo

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  15. I'm sitting here at the computer completely worn out because of the day I've had with my youngest. battle after battle, constant discipline, so much crying and whining.... it's SO hard sometimes, it really is! I loved reading this just now... not only is it encouraging on these types of days to be reminded that NONE of us are in this alone and we all have struggles with these dear children of ours, but I just love what you reminded me of-- which is my own heart and my own Father who wants to see me obey and love Him. Grace abounds for us as parents AND as sinners ourselves! praise the Lord for that! :)

    ps. hang in there, sweet mama. :)

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  16. Hey girl...just stopping by from Leslie's blog. :) My first and only is 9 months next week, and I've found myself more and more interested in ways to discipline, as we're just starting into the phase of having to tell her 'No.' I have to admit... this:

    i would say that learning how to discipline my child in a consistent way that is honoring to the Lord is probably the hardest thing i've ever done in my entire life.

    yeah, that is slightly terrifying. But I am extremely grateful for friends (bloggers and real-life) that are one step ahead of me and can offer sound wisdom and advice. So thank you, from the bottom of my heart. Thank you for being raw and honest and for sharing.
    Have a blessed day!!

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