and i have learned quite a bit in the last 2 and a half months. a lot more than i thought i would. some fun lessons to learn, some not-so-fun lessons to learn. i thought i'd share a few of those lessons with you.
1. little boys like to put things in their ears & nostrils. i had to sterilize my tweezers because i pulled a cheerio out of a nostril & cotton out of an ear drum. i have learned that my boy is a champion potty trainer. anything for a mickey sticker, right? i have also learned that my little dude thinks slamming the back door on his sister's pinky is just hi-lar-i-ous. but that same big brother makes absolute sure that everyone that says hi to him says hi to his little sissygirl too.
2. my little girl might have the sweetest little smile & wear tutus and bows all the times but she likes to eat snails & dirt & her poop smells worse than miles' ever did. i have learned that this girl is sweeter than honey - but she absolutely hates when her big brother takes her toy away - and that back will arch so fast and her scream will be so high-pitched that you won't even know what hit you.
3. when you really put your heart & soul & determination into something, you can do it. such as parenting, disciplining, weight loss, etsy shops, relationship with your husband, and most importantly, relationship with the Lord. none of the above things mentioned have been easy or quick for me to do over the last 3 months, but i have seen improvement & my hard work is slowly starting to pay off.
4. for me personally, i have learned that putting down my phone or walking away from the computer makes a world of difference in my mothering and as a wife. it means getting down on the floor & building legos with miles. it means giving camden a bottle distraction free. it means sitting down with scott at the end of the day and watching our favorite tv show instead of sitting at my desk in another room.
5. i have learned that for me personally, i function better & my kids and husband are happier when i honor them in these ways. i took february off from any custom orders (such as custom prints, invites, announcements, etc.) and it relieved a lot of stress from me. i felt relaxed at the end of the day & scott wasn't coming in the room asking when i'd be done working.
and for awhile, i felt guilty. i felt guilty that i wasn't commenting on blog posts all the time & i felt guilty that moments with my children & husband & the Lord weren't being documented on my blog (which gets transferred to a book every year). i felt guilty that i was turning down custom work; i felt guilty that i wasn't as timely at returning texts or emails.
but now, i have realized that it is okay. it is a season. and i envy the moms who can keep up with everything like blogging on a daily basis & designing elaborate invites for people every night. i wish i could be like you! but i am not. i have two small little children (& a very hard-working husband) who need their mama (& wife) to be a lot more relaxed than i have been.
so here is something that i have learned that i am putting into action:
forgive me because i am going to take a longer break from doing custom work in my shop. now...don't get me wrong. my shop will stay open and the prints & cards will be for sale!! i love my shop!! and i'll be adding more prints & cards here and there because i really, really enjoy using my creativity in those ways. and i enjoy packing up pretty prints that will make a wall really happy somewhere. it brings me so much joy to send those orders out!
but for now, i'm going to take a break from working on custom orders (customized prints, invites, announcments, photo cards, etc.) i have a few extremely talented friends that i can refer you to if you are in need of some design work. and the break won't be forever, just a few months until i can get better organized with my days and feel more rested at the end of them.
i know that i still have so much to learn and so far to come as a wife & mom. but i also know that the amount that the Lord has taught me in just a few months has honestly freed me to make some much-needed changes in this home of ours.
this season has been really challenging for me. i feel overwhelmed a lot, i feel lonely sometimes, and i feel inadequate 99% of the time. and a month or so ago, it was a really beautiful day in the middle of a cold week. the sun was shining, birds were chirping, & i packed up the kids in the stroller & we made the 5 minute walk down to the park. and i remember feeling so thankful to the Lord that he gave me that glimpse of spring. because winters can feel so long. so long. and that day was just what we needed to get through the rest of that cold week. it was refreshing and energizing.
and i feel like that sometimes. i feel like this season of life is LONG. a lot of repetitive routines & words coming out of my mouth. a lot of conversations with children and not a lot of adult ones. a lot of getting to the end of the day so drained that without even noticing you end up watching the train movie you put on for miles an hour before - all by yourself. in some ways, i feel in the middle of a long winter. and some days, a snowed in one. but the Lord gently reminds me that spring is there - it is on it's little ol' way.
and while i'm learning to soak up every lesson this winter is teaching me, i'm very, very excited for that spring.